I am currently teaching a 4 week class, and one of the subjects I'm teaching on is "boundaries". This as many people in my life know is one of my favorite subjects. :) I haven't studied it for awhile to teaching it again brought to mind some fundamental principles that I was reminded of and would like to share.
As most of us know we need to have healthy boundaries for our lives to be in balance. If you life is feeling out of balance it is very possible that you are having boundary problems. I am going to share a few of the most common ways our boundaries become out of balance:
1. When our priorities are out of order:
We all have times that our priorities are out of alignment but if this is becoming a way of life you are probably noticing some problems. Or is 2 or more of these areas are out of balance you will notice your life becoming out of balance. Generally most people agree this is the priority order that we should strive to keep in place:
God, Spouse, Children, Job, Church, extended family and friends.
2. When you take responsibility for others daily problems and loads that were meant for them (and yes mom this includes your adult kids).
Galatians 6: - 5 says: Bear one another's burdens, and so fulfill the law of Christ. For if anyone thinks himself to be something when he is nothing he deceives himself. But let each one examine his own work and then he will have rejoicing in himself alone, and not in another. For each one shall bear his own load.
First, look at verse 2 - "Bear one another's burdens" the Greek word for burden gives us insight into the meaning of this verse - it means "a burden so heavy that they weigh us down" like a boulder that could crush us that we can't lift on our own. We need help with these burdens and we should help others with these burdens. They are times of crisis and tragedy in our lives.
Next, look at verse 5 - "each should carry his own load" Everyone has responsibilities that only he or she can carry or should carry. The Greek word for load is "cargo" or "burden of daily toil"
These loads are like knapsacks. We are expected to carry our own knapsack. Yes they are burdensome at times but they are still our responsibility. These are the everyday issues that we need to let others take personal responsibility for. Working, paying your bills, taking responsibility for the everyday tasks of life. When we are constantly helping others in this area we are out of balance and will eventually begin to resent it and we are hindering the growth of the one that should be doing this.
We will continue the rest of the list next time. We have 3 more principles to look at.