Monday, June 29, 2009

Sunday at Nana'a house

As we all know if we are living in Florida, it is hot!! There are very few things that will get me outside with this type of weather. I am a northern girl and Florida summers are torture to me, and it is especially torturous right now.

But there is one reason only that I will go outside for an extended period of time and that is to see my grandgirls have fun. Being a Sanguine Nana, or otter Nana, it is especially important that when Anna and Kaitlyn are with me that we have some measure of FUN! if not a whole day of FUN.

Well, we do not have a built in pool so we went out and got a blow up pool with elephants that the water comes out of their trunks. We got a big enough pool for the girls to have fun and get wet but small enough that we can keep in the covered porch area. I am willing to sacrifice coolness but I draw the line at sitting in the direct sun for hours.
So this was our Sunday at Nana's house. Tea time by the pool, and lots of water fun in the elephant pool on the porch and the bonus for Nana is the pool is too small for me to get into to so although I was hot I did not have to get my hair wet. :) We even put bubble bath in the pool to make lots of suds and had blew bubbles that you can hold in your hand.
It was hot but worth the smiles and the laughs that will live in my heart forever.

Next Post: Back to Life Coaching topic - Establish a Healthy Self-Esteem.

Sunday, June 21, 2009

Thots of My Dad on this Fathers Day

Today I am dedicating my blog to my dad.  Just as I said on Mother's Day - Father's Day is a bitter-sweet day also.  It is a day to gather with family, watch my kids honor their father (who by the way is a great dad!) and even see the blessing of my son-in-law being the amazing daddy he is to his two little girls.  All I can say is Kaitlyn and Anna are very blessed to have a daddy like Abel.  He is one of the most patient and caring men I know - the other one is my hubby.

But in the midst of all these wonderful blessings there is an empty place in my heart today as my dad is no longer with us.  He was and still is my hero.  Not just because he was my dad but because of all the people I have ever known, my dad made a choice to change from a man who dealt with alot of anger and control issues in his younger years to the most gracious, kind, loving, caring and giving person in my and many others lives.  He is a true example of how God can change a life and of how we as parents and Christians should always be moving toward our strengths and working with God's help on our weaknesses.  

My dad knew his shortcomings and one of his main goals in life was to be a kind and good person.  A person who could speak hope and encouragement into every ones life that came into his path.  That was one of his main goals (his number one goal was to take care of "mommy" :)
and he accomplished both of those goals with perfection.

Dad, I miss you more that I can say, you always made me feel I could be and do anything.  You listened to all my silly life stories and in fact seemed to enjoy hearing about all that was going on in my life.  I remember the list of questions you would have written down when I came to visit every Friday.  I remember the china cups on the table ready to be filled when I came in the door with your wonderful brewed coffee.  I remember the wonderful "peace" that filled your home. The little chocolates beside the cups and possibly a quick song with "mommy"  or a recited poem.  I remember your love and care for my mom until the very end.  I especially liked the "Florida Throat" song. :)  We talked almost everyday and I can still hear the familiar voice on the phone saying with a sweet bit of laughter, "My Pal!, how are you doing partner?"  Oh how I wish I could call and hear that voice one more time.  I know one day I will but until then it is a bit hard on days like this.  Thank you dad for all you taught me - I find myself being and thinking more and more like you everyday, enjoying the simple things in life and trying to be an encouragement to those around me.  Oh, if I can only accomplish half of what you did in peoples live I will feel I have done well.

Well, I have to admit I have sat here at my computer writing this blog in tears.  But I think they are good tears.  It's been 4 years since my dad left us and I have grieved properly, but days like today - it is good to remember, to cry and to be thankful for those God has put in our lives.  

I know I say this every mothers and fathers day but I don't think I can ever repeat it enough.  If your dad is still alive - enjoy the moments, resolve the issues to the extent that you can and don't be so busy you regret when they are gone that you didn't spend more time, especially unhurried time.  I know its hard as our parents get older - you have to be more patient and slow but I can promise you - you will never regret slowing down, talking more (even about seemingly unimportant things), sitting and having coffee more often -  for those will be the moments you will hold on to when they are gone.

Happy Fathers Day!

Thursday, June 11, 2009

The Four Basic Personality Types

Today I will finish up talking about personality test with introducing the four basic personality types. They come with many names but the 4 types whatever the test or name is the same.

I saved the best for last. The following web link will give you every type of name you can
think of for the different personality types, plus about every personality test there is available. There is also a link at this site to love language styles, spiritual gift tests and learning styles.

Here it is...have fun!

I am going to attach a handout on each personality. Once you take a test of your choice - whether it be the DISC or the Gary Smalley test or the Personality Plus test (these are my 3 favorites) you will usually find you have a primary personality type and a secondary. Whatever your primary (highest scored) personality type is - you would look through the handout and use the information to help you use your strengths in the best possible way and take an honest look at your weaknesses so you can work on them. On these handouts you will also notice biblical characters that possibly had the same personality blend as you and look up the scriptures and study that person in the bible to see how God used them. You can also have those closest to you take a test and read each others handouts to get a better understanding of each other. These are great tools to add value to all areas of our lives.

Phlegmatic/S/Golden Retriever

I looked at the preview and these handouts came out pretty small. If you are interested in having these handouts I would be glad to send them to you - just e-mail me and ask for the personality handouts - my e-mail is

Addendum: This is too funny - for some reason the Melancholy and the Phlegmatic handout can be clicked one time and come up to full page size. The Sanguine and the Choleric will not. But we shouldn't be surprised as Sanguines and Cholerics usually do not comply as well as the other personality types. :)

Thursday, June 4, 2009

Take a Personality Test? Why Not?

Last post we talked about the negative statements people make about taking personality tests. Hopefully I disproved or at least gave some food for thought to those statements.

Each post I am going to put a link to a test that I am familiar with. I do not have a lot of experience with the tests that use 16 different points of personality. I am better versed in the basic four (we will discuss this more in the next post) Today's link will take you to Gary Smalley's test that is based on the 4 basic personality types which he assigns animals to, The Otter, the Beaver, the Golden Retriever and the Lion.

This is hands down my favorite analogy of personalities. And the test is usually pretty accurate. The link is

Just to let you know I ALWAYS come out being an OTTER which I love - but I don't love the secondary trait I have which is the LION. We will get more into the personality types later. My husband is a BEAVER/GOLDEN RETRIEVER. I can assure you that is a challenging combination of personalities! He wants to work all the time and I want to have fun! What's wrong with him?????? :)

Today we will look at all the positives of taking a personality test:

1. It Gives you a Clear View of your Strengths and Weaknesses: Knowing your personality can help you use your strengths for good and to find the best fit in life situations for you. It can, when used properly, guide you toward situations, groups, and career choices where your strengths are most valued and appreciated. It can also and usually does, reveal blind spots (weaknesses) that may be hindering us in relationships, job situations and life satisfaction. Knowing how others see you help you see yourself more clearly.

2. It will enhance your relationships: When you begin to understand the basic personality types you can many times see what type of personality those in your life have. If they will do a test that would be the best situation but if not you can still in most cases figure it out. Understanding someone elses personality can give you insight to help you communicate better with them, understand them better, take things less personally, and occasionally give you some tools to help them with their weaknesses. This is true with both family, friend and job relationships. You will find you will get along with people better when you understand yourself and others to a greater degree.

3. It will guide you into a job or career situation that is most satisfying: Many jobs have qualities that are naturally more attractive and fulfilling to certain personality types. For example, some personalities need to be around people, need to feel included and need to have incentives to be happy, where as some personality types need to be alone, are very task oriented and really do not want to be bothered when doing their work. If you are uncertain about what type of work you want to do or are unhappy with the work you are doing it may be helpful to learn about what types of jobs people with your personality type have found happiness in.

On a personal note, one of the greatest tools I was given in my marriage was when I was introduced to the personality types. The more I learned about my "beaver" husband the more grace I gave when he didn't act, say or do what I thought in my "otter" mind was supposed to happen. I began to realize that otters and beavers do things very differently and I needed to understand that beavers are task oriented and need time alone and are VERY detailed and do not get extremely excited about anything and not always the most social of animals (or people). When I really got this concept, I began to give my sweet beaver husband some grace and it works the other way around to. I also have great relationships with my kids because I began to understand they are not like me but they have their own unique personalities and we all (as of course my kids are well versed in personality types and taken I don't' know how many tests) began to work with and around those traits. We all have learned to give a little more, understand a little more and continue to work on those areas in our lives that need to be adjusted.

REMEMBER, that people don't fit neatly into personality compartments. Every person is unique, but knowing you share some characteristics with certain personality types, will many times serve as a guide in determining environments in which you will feel more comfortable or career that you might more fully enjoy.

Next Post - THE Basic Four Personality Types...