Friday, July 23, 2010

Friendships Among Women - Ending Friendships

Ending a Friendship

This is a hard post to write on friendship but it is a reality of life that we have all experienced at one time or another. Not every friendship in your life will last a lifetime. Some friendships will last through all the changes and seasons of life and some will not. That doesn't mean the ones that don't weren't necessary or important, they were there for the season they were needed. Many of us are able to keep a few friends from our childhood, but this can be difficult as we get older. Distance can cause a friendship to fade, as can change of circumstances in our lives. Sometimes we just grow apart.

It's not always a negative thing to end a friendship, sometimes it just happens naturally over time. Other times, the friendship ends because of a disagreement or a major change in life. Sometimes a friendship can become unhealthy and negative. There are friends that tend to be users, or overly negative or in a perpetual crisis. Over time these types of friends will wear on us. When a friend starts taking away from your happiness and creating more stress, it could be a sign you need to end or distance the relationship.

Some of your friendships will inevitably change over time. The path your life takes will determine the friends you keep and the friends you must say good-bye to.

There was a poem that circulated for awhile that talked about this and I really believe it is true. So when you look at friendships from this perspective you never have to feel it was wasted or shouldn't have been but that some friends are for a reason, some for a season and some for a lifetime. But you always will learn something from them all.

Reason, Season, or Lifetime

People come into your life for a reason, a season or a lifetime.
When you figure out which one it is,
you will know what to do for each person.

When someone is in your life for a REASON,
it is usually to meet a need you have expressed.
They have come to assist you through a difficulty;
to provide you with guidance and support;
to aid you physically, emotionally or spiritually.
They may seem like a godsend, and they are.
They are there for the reason you need them to be.

Then, without any wrongdoing on your part or at an inconvenient time,
this person will say or do something to bring the relationship to an end.
Sometimes they die. Sometimes they walk away.
Sometimes they act up and force you to take a stand.
What we must realize is that our need has been met, our desire fulfilled; their work is done.
The prayer you sent up has been answered and now it is time to move on.

Some people come into your life for a SEASON,
because your turn has come to share, grow or learn.
They bring you an experience of peace or make you laugh.
They may teach you something you have never done.
They usually give you an unbelievable amount of joy.
Believe it. It is real. But only for a season.

LIFETIME relationships teach you lifetime lessons;
things you must build upon in order to have a solid emotional foundation.
Your job is to accept the lesson, love the person,
and put what you have learned to use in all other relationships and areas of your life.

— Unknown

1 comment:

Beverly Walters Whaley said...

Coach K.....What a great reality check...It is hard....when people fade in and out of our lives...and sometimes it is wanted and is just time for the fade. Thanks again, for the insite and reminder that not everything is intended to remain the same in our lives.....but to greet the change as healthy. Great Post!